Lived Experience Forum

[Anon3112]

I’ve been on antidepressants for the past few months and things have been really good. Regardless I feel like all the years I struggled with depression on my own have become this strange secret that’s holding me down. Especially my past self harm. I feel so alone that I can’t share this with anyone. And it went on for so long. Even to psychologists when I try to talk about things like that I just can’t speak. I just want someone to know so I’m not stuck with this secret.

[tyme]

Welcome @Anon3112 ,

Thank you for sharing this secret with us. It takes a lot of courage to reach out to a community space and share parts of your life you have not shared with others.

In terms of self-harm and depression, I am sure there are many members who can relate, including myself. I hope you will find the support and connection here that you deserve.

I look forward to seeing you around on the forums.

tyme

[NatureLover]

Welcome, @Anon3112 , it's good to have you here.

I'm really glad things have improved for you recently 🙂

I'm wondering if you can write it down and give it to your psychologist to read? Even print out your post above, to give them?

A handy forum tip is if you type @ and then click on a name in the drop-down box, that person will get a notification and won't miss your reply to them. 

I hope you find the forums supportive. 

[Bow]

Hey @Anon3112  firstly welcome to the forums, I’m glad you have found us and hope that in sharing your secret here that you don’t feel quite as alone.

I’m glad that you have been feeling better recently and that the medication is helping you. I really hope that in being able to share your secret here that it gives you a little bit of courage to be able to share it with someone in real life too. I’ve often used the forums as a practice to talking about things in real life. I often write things in my journal that I have shared here and given it to my psychologist to read…. I’ve even got to the point where I’m able to read it out aloud myself sometimes….. it’s really freeing knowing that those things don’t have as much power over me anymore. I’d really encourage you to give it a go. I’ve also found that nothing really surprises my psychologist…. If it’s something that your scared of…. They have probably heard it so many times before. 

wishing you all the best.

🎀

[FloatingFeather]

Hi @Anon3112,

Welcome to the forums. My name is FloatingFeather and I am one of the peer support workers at SANE. Thank you for sharing your secret with us, I can see that this is something you have struggled to share and hope sharing with us helps you find some comfort. The forums are actually a really good place to share things you don't feel you are ready / can't share with anyone else because you are anonymous, you are amongst friends, you are safe, and you aren't judged.

Struggling with depression alone for so long must have been so exhausting and difficult for you. I think the strength you have shown coping with depression alone for years along with the fact that you are now receiving support is something you should be really proud of.

Maybe, when you feel comfortable, you may want to discuss this with your psychologist. A psychologist can be a great person to unpack things with in a safe and supportive environment with no judgement. 

I wish you all the best and thank you again for sharing with us - I hope it has helped to share.

Best wishes,

FloatingFeather

[Christheart]

@Anon3112 Forgive yourself. There’s nothing to be ashamed of. I’m glad you are feeling better now ❤️