Lived Experience Forum

[BPDrose]

Hi, 

(I'm still trying to workout who you used this forum.)

I just got diagnosed with borderline personality disorder and possible bipolar this last week and it's thrown me and my emotions a lot, even more than what my moods are usually like. just struggling a lot to accept this diagnosis and what it means for me as a person trying to live a good life. 
I'm here cuz I want some support I guess. My family doenst know about what I'm going through, so I feel very alone and I'm glad I can find people who are experiencing what I am. 

thank you for this community  🙏🏻 

[NatureLover]

Hi and welcome, @BPDrose , it's good you've joined, where people can understand what you're going through. 

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@BPDrose wrote:

just struggling a lot to accept this diagnosis and what it means for me as a person trying to live a good life. 

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It sounds like you've had a bit of a shock. I'm guessing you have professional support, if you've just been diagnosed? Do you have a good counsellor / psychologist, or a psychiatrist who does talk therapy? 

As I understand it, BPD takes some time to understand. I don't have it myself, but quite a few people here on the forums do.

I wish you all the best as you come to terms for what this means for you, @BPDrose . 

@BPDSurvivor 

[BPDSurvivor]

Hi @BPDrose , welcome to the forums.

How are you travelling? 

A diagnosis can be a scary thing for some, while a relief to others. When I was diagnosed with BPD, I was sort of relieved to know that there was a 'reason' for my emotional outbursts and instability. 

From there, I sat on the diagnosis a bit, but when my life started falling apart, I sought  help. Thank God I did. I was a long hi process, but I've learnt so much and have grown so much. 

Come and join us at Raising Awareness of BPD - Flipping the Script . Feel free to share your thoughts, wonderings, questions etc. with others who have BPD.

BPDSurvivor

P.S. Thanks @NatureLover for the tag!

[BPDrose]

Yesterday my dr told me I will be waiting for at least 2-4 weeks till I can see a therapist. I’m really upset about that

[BPDrose]

Thank you. Yes I’m glad I have an answer as to why. But it’s still very daunting

[NatureLover]

@BPDrose  I'm sorry to hear about your upset.

From what I can tell, 2 - 4 weeks is pretty fast these days...sadly. I remember when I was at my most intensely suicidal, I had to wait 3 months. Sorry to say.

I hope that you wil be OK in the meantime, and that it's closer to 2 weeks than 4 weeks that you have to wait. 

[BPDrose]

It’s more that idk what could happen in the next weeks. I’m doing all I can to not self harm as I’ve been threatened with a hospitalisation if I do it again. And I know that not a good coping skill, but it makes it harder now.
And I am rather impulsive at times and I’m scared I will do some stupid things and then hate myself and self harm from feeling so bad about it after.
And I can’t tell anyone this! And I don’t wanna tell the dr this cuz he’s a guy and will not understand. I wish I had my old therapist from a few years ago still she was so kind and helped me. I miss her a lot when I’m struggling bad

[NatureLover]

@BPDrose  I'm really sorry you're struggling so much. 😞

If you can post on here when you're feeling like you want peer support in the next few weeks, it might help to talk to people who understand (but please do not mention methods of self harm). If you are in imminent danger of self harming, it's a good idea to ring a helpline - they are listed on this page, to the right. 

Also, a handy forum tip is if you type @ and then click on a member's name in the srtop-down box, they will get a notification that you've replied to them, and won't miss your post. 

All the best, @BPDrose ...